Monday, January 23, 2012

Conversation with Charlie

At church. I am holding Charlie and he is looking behind me at someone and starts pointing. I turn to see what he is trying to tell me and realize he is pointing at an interesting looking African American man in a big trench coat. This man happens to also have a very low voice that sounds sort of monotone. So, this scenario was apparently scary for Charlie. I turn him around and say that yes I see him but it is not polite to point and Charlie proceeds t have this conversation with me:

Charlie: But mom the brown man is scary looking.

Mom: God makes people all different colors doesn't he.

Charlie: But him is very scary. Him is a vampire!

Mom: Shhhh. No he is not. There are no such things as vampires.

Charlie: Yes, him is one. I saw a real one.

Mom: No you did not.

Charlie: Yes, I did, on Scooby Doo.

Mom: Charlie, that is just a nice man, not a vampire.

Charlie: Him has a scary face.

Mom; Why don't you smile at him. I bet he will smile back at you.

Charlie: (Grinning hugely over my shoulder) Him is not smiling at me.

Mom: Smile a little bigger.

Charlie: (Taking his fingers and stretching his mouth wider over my shoulder at the man) Him is still not smiling at me.

Mom: Charlie why don't you just put your head on my shoulder?

Charlie: I saw him's fangs!

Mom: No, no you did not. He does not have fangs.

Charlie: Yes him does and I saw he has no feet, him is floating! Vampires can fly!

Mom: Charlie, please lets not talk about this right now.

Charlie: Him is doing this! (folds his hands and closes his eyes)

Mom: He is praying.

Charlie: No, him is a vampire.

Really wishing the dude would have just smiled at Charlie to end the conversation!

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Fitting the Mold

Lately I have spent what seems like a TON of time defending my kids individually for not "fitting the mold" for different situations.

"Well, he didn't do well on that test because he doesn't learn the way they teach.."
"She is so sweet, she just has a hard time understanding that this is serious..."
"He isn't extremely social, because most kids don't like to talk about what he likes to talk about..."
"He colors outside the lines because I think he just doesn't really love coloring..."
"He doesn't recite all his letters yet because he is more interested in social stuff..."

Kids are Kids. They are going to have moments upon moments where we as their parents know they are good, neat and interesting,  but we want so badly for the rest of the world - their teachers, coaches, music instructors, friends - to understand and know what we know about them. We will try so hard to help them "fit the mold" of their classrooms, or teams etc. At some point we really want to just scream, "WHY!" These kids are just so awesome just how they are, why do we need to prove to others of their worthiness to be taught, coached etc. Because we are their parents and we are dying for others out in the world to treat them the way we know they deserve to be treated. The only way for that to happen is for them to know our children the way we know them. This will never fully happen. No one will know our children the way we parents do. But it is not a bad goal to try to put them in the paths of people who want to and are willing to really try to know them and make a positive difference in their lives.

Tonight, I am praying for the people in the paths of my children. That they see in my kids even half of the potential, that I see. Because if they did, then they would not see their differences as a bad thing and always be trying to change them and make them "fit the mold." Molds are boring.