Saturday, July 31, 2010

Perspective

So we were out with friends for dinner. Again. (Yes, 2 nights in a row, and that's quite an upset. Never happens. Kids I think are fine with it, since they get to have another "kid-oriented" dinner and a movie with the sitter). Anyway, we are having a super relaxing evening, when as it is coming to an end I hear my husband say, "We are so close to our house, you guys should come by, check out what we have done." WHAT!!! WAS!!! HE!!! THINKING!!! ? I check the time. Our sitter would still be putting kids to bed. She wouldn't have started in on the fabulous straightening up job she does each night she sits for us. (The straightening job that we are willing to pay an extra 2hrs of sitting for, so we make sure we always come home after the kids have been in bed for a while.) Perhaps when he popped home to change clothes for the dinner he managed to miss seeing the bags piled up in the mudroom from our trip a week ago, the piles of shoes that no one put back in those handy tubs I purchased for shoes, the weird smell in the mudroom from the mildewy pool towels hanging there, the piles of clean laundry needing to be folded, the taco dinner mess covering the counters in the kitchen, my desk full of paperwork to be gone through and every other little thing my kids stash on my desk, Elaina's clothing strewn all over her floor since she likes to change her clothes 12 times a day, Scotty and Jack's underwear on their bedroom floor, closet door open displaying THEIR idea of a clean closet, our bedroom with a huge suitcase on the floor full of clothes to be put away... The interesting thing was this: after our friends toured our very LIVED-IN home, they leave, I look at my husband, mortified, and say, "I can't believe you let them in our home tonight! How embarrassing." He says, "Oh, I didn't think it looked that bad, actually we are in pretty good shape." I had to nod and admit that it could have been much worse. My goodness how one's perspective changes as each child is entered into the mix. I barely can recall a time when things were tidy and straight most of the time. I do recall a time when a spur of the moment invitation didn't throw me into a cold sweat. I recall a time when I had appetizers at the ready for a "quick stop by our house." But I also recall a time when popping by our home for a bit with friends meant trying to think of topics to talk about with them and showing them a boring landscape of pretty things I collected. Oh, how funny we were, worrying about where to place what furniture or where to display a vase. Today those decisions are made for us: the furniture goes wherever it is least likely to get destroyed, yet still be of use. The vase goes....up high. And today we don't wait for the perfect moment to bring our friends by. There never is a perfect moment, so we use the moments we have, even when those moments are full of underwear on the floor and dust on the piano. Even if those moments are full of toilets that need flushed and toothpaste on the sink. And especially if those moments are full of rambunctious kids excited to see their parents who popped home early with friends for a visit. Yes, especially if those moments are full of handshakes from 11-yr-olds, "check out what I"m creating" from my 9yr old, a thrilled hug and kiss from my 6 year old, and 2 little heads popping up smiling from books with the sitter in their beds. We may not be "prepared" for guests all the time, but we've definitely grown to appreciate showing off more than a clean counter. I'm so thankful for my lived-in home, and those who live here.

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